Monday, November 14, 2011

Locked Down

So this morning started off like every other morning:  feeding the monster and going back to bed until 8 am.  I got up, had my breakfast and checked on him-- still passed out.  So I decided to use this quiet time to take a quick shower.  Not wanting the noise of the shower to wake the baby, I closed the door to the bathroom.

Now I need to explain a recent house project of mine:  We we a mix of original door knobs and replacement door knobs on our second floor.  Some are 90 years old and tarnished while some are a sparkling brass.  I hate both.  So as we paint each room, I have been removing the hardware and spraying them oil rubbed bronze.  They look quite nice.

The most recent room we painted was the bathroom ( I promise to share soon, it's not quite ready for it's close up yet ;) and I had repainted the knob.  Unfortunately, in the painting process I lost a little pin that makes the latch move when you turn the knob.

...are you seeing where I am going with this?

I get out of the shower and go to open the door.

and it won't open.

(Mom.. look away)


FUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

I am locked in the bathroom.

For some reason, I brought my phone into the bathroom with me (something I almost never do) and thank GOD I did.  I called JEGs to explain my situation to him.  He suggested trying to put something in the whole where the pin went to get the latch to open.  I broke a Q-tip in half and jammed it in, but it didn't work.  Next was take the door off the hinges.  I got all the pins out of the hinges, but I wasn't strong enough to actually pull the door off.  Then he says to call our next-door neighbor Amy and see if she can come over and let me out, but I pointed out the front door is locked.

JEGs sighs and says "... I'm on my way home."

I was doing really well finding the humor in the situation until the I heard something over the baby monitor (which I also brought into the bathroom... I really don't usually have that many electronic with me, swears).

Hunter crying.

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT.

Now I am a mother desperate to soothe her crying baby and I go at the door like motha effin' HULK himself.  I started pulling at every corner I could.  I yanked the towel bar off.  I may or may not have kicked the door. I calm myself down and think that JEGs is only 30 minutes away and Hunter will be ok for that time.

Then JEGs calls to tell me he is at a stand still on a highway.  FML.

I decided to try my Q-tip contraption again to no avail.  Finally, I just started twisting the knob and jiggling it, till I saw the latch move a little.  I got it to move enough so I could jam another Q-tip in and pushed it open.

As I yanked the door open, I forgot that I had taken it off the hinges.

TIMBBBBEEERRRR

The door came crashing down on me.

I caught it before I completely smashed my head into the tub, propped it up against the wall and ran to my screaming child.

Looking back, I am so glad I randomly brought my phone into the bathroom with me.  If I hadn't, I probably would have had to yell out the bathroom window for help...and that just would have been embarrassing.

New house rule:  Never close the bathroom door if you are home alone.  That, and always keep a screw driver in the bathroom- just in case of an emergency.

Always & Forever,
  ME

5 comments:

Lynett said...

OMG! How horrible, and funny at the same time. I can imagine your desperation when you heard little Hunter crying! I would have definitely kicked the door to! Glad youre ok!

melissamevans said...

man oh man.....that's insane!! Lesson learned...who would've thunk it hey.

Kelsey Knops said...

Holy cows woman! I stumbled upon your blog going from blog to blog ya know how it is and suddenly I'm reading a post that is making me laugh, we're talking tears streaming down my cheeks laugh. This is SOOOO relatable, I can picture this being me! The panic, anger, desperation and swearing is perfection. <3 You just found yourself a new reader.

bethany said...

Oh my gosh...excuse me while I DIE laughing. I hope that's okay. I can just imagine myself in that situation being 99.9% LESS cool and collected than you were.

But I can't stop giggling at the thought of you pawing at the door trying to get to your young. Like a good lil' mama bear. :)

Oonafey said...

I know it wasn't funny at the time, but I couldn't help giggling. When my mom first had my brother, she locked him in the car at the mall... It happens to everybody!