So this morning started off like every other morning: feeding the monster and going back to bed until 8 am. I got up, had my breakfast and checked on him-- still passed out. So I decided to use this quiet time to take a quick shower. Not wanting the noise of the shower to wake the baby, I closed the door to the bathroom.
Now I need to explain a recent house project of mine: We we a mix of original door knobs and replacement door knobs on our second floor. Some are 90 years old and tarnished while some are a sparkling brass. I hate both. So as we paint each room, I have been removing the hardware and spraying them oil rubbed bronze. They look quite nice.
The most recent room we painted was the bathroom ( I promise to share soon, it's not quite ready for it's close up yet ;) and I had repainted the knob. Unfortunately, in the painting process I lost a little pin that makes the latch move when you turn the knob.
...are you seeing where I am going with this?
I get out of the shower and go to open the door.
and it won't open.
(Mom.. look away)
I am locked in the bathroom.
For some reason, I brought my phone into the bathroom with me (something I almost never do) and thank GOD I did. I called JEGs to explain my situation to him. He suggested trying to put something in the whole where the pin went to get the latch to open. I broke a Q-tip in half and jammed it in, but it didn't work. Next was take the door off the hinges. I got all the pins out of the hinges, but I wasn't strong enough to actually pull the door off. Then he says to call our next-door neighbor Amy and see if she can come over and let me out, but I pointed out the front door is locked.
JEGs sighs and says "... I'm on my way home."
I was doing really well finding the humor in the situation until the I heard something over the baby monitor (which I also brought into the bathroom... I really don't usually have that many electronic with me, swears).
Now I am a mother desperate to soothe her crying baby and I go at the door like motha effin' HULK himself. I started pulling at every corner I could. I yanked the towel bar off. I may or may not have kicked the door. I calm myself down and think that JEGs is only 30 minutes away and Hunter will be ok for that time.
Then JEGs calls to tell me he is at a stand still on a highway. FML.
I decided to try my Q-tip contraption again to no avail. Finally, I just started twisting the knob and jiggling it, till I saw the latch move a little. I got it to move enough so I could jam another Q-tip in and pushed it open.
As I yanked the door open, I forgot that I had taken it off the hinges.
The door came crashing down on me.
I caught it before I completely smashed my head into the tub, propped it up against the wall and ran to my screaming child.
Looking back, I am so glad I randomly brought my phone into the bathroom with me. If I hadn't, I probably would have had to yell out the bathroom window for help...and that just would have been embarrassing.
New house rule: Never close the bathroom door if you are home alone. That, and always keep a screw driver in the bathroom- just in case of an emergency.
After much debate, I decided to document the monster's monthly photo with his monkey on our rocking chair (which, according to my brother Tim, is not nearly 40-years-old. Denial much?)
Congrats dude, you made it to a month old. We are pretty stoked about that. We may or may not have patted ourselves on the back for keeping you alive this long.
This past month you have probably gotten your picture taken no less then 4,000 times and most of them are living on Mommy and Daddy's cell phones.
We had a little trouble the first week with the breastfeeding, but we hit our stride during week two. Now you attack that ish like a gremlin. We have even established a pretty solid schedule of eating every two hours.
Right out of the gate you were a champion sleeper. If we put you to bed around 10 pm, you wake up between 3 and 4 for a feeding and then snooze on till at least 7:30 am. It is kind of awesome. [Edit: of course the past two nights you have decided that 5:30 is more of an appropriate time to get up. Mommy does not appreciate that at all. Check yourself dude]
You successfully transitioned from the bassinet to the crib. You slept perfectly fine the whole night. Mommy, on the other hand, was a mess. She kept grabbing the monitor and thinking "Why can't I hear him breath? Is he OK? Does he need me? Why isn't he upset that I am not within arms reach????"
You totally smile at us. I know people say it's just gas, or you are peeing yourself, but we know it's cause you like us.
At your one-month check up you clocked in at a whopping 9lbs 5oz and you are still a lanky 22 1/4 inches tall. You have already outgrown all your newborn clothes and are easily fitting into 3 month clothes.
You have somehow acquired the nickname "Bubbers". Ok, I confess, it was me- I started calling you Bubbers. And I am sorry.
You got to meet all your first cousins, and they were very excited to meet you
You have completely charmed us, little man. We love everything about you.